


Destiny

by sinfuldesire_archivist



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Angst, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-01-13
Updated: 2008-01-13
Packaged: 2018-09-08 01:41:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8825176
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinfuldesire_archivist/pseuds/sinfuldesire_archivist
Summary: Jared dumps Sandy, Jensen starts dating the playmate again, Jared meets a new guy, Jensen admits how he feels, will out boys end up together?





	

**Author's Note:**

> Note from the Sinful Desire archivists: this story was originally archived at [Sinful-Desire.org](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Sinful_Desire). To preserve the archive, we began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2016. We e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact us using the e-mail address on [Sinful Desire collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/sinfuldesire/profile).

Jared sighed and stared gloomily into his beer. 

 

Dammit all to hell, his mind growled as he drank some. This was not how everything was supposed to be going. He was not supposed to have dumped Sandy and work the nerve to tell Jensen that he was in love with him just when Jensen started dating the damned blond playmate again. He was a bit drunk at this point and his already minimal inhibitions were lowered even more.

 

It was because of this that he blamed his staring on.

 

He really couldn't help it.

 

Just because he was in love with Jensen didn't meant that he didn't notice a gorgeous body.

 

And he did have a gorgeous body. And gorgeous eyes- Wait, _what?_

 

Jared spun quickly in his stool to face the bar, his back turned on the mysterious stranger. He closed his eyes and drank a little more beer, hoping that against all odds the man hadn't _actually_ noticed his gaze.

 

" 'Ello... 'Ave a ligh' per chance?" Jared shivered as the honeyed British accent slid down his back.

 

"Um," Jared turned. It was him, the man with that incredible body. "Yeah, here." he pulled out a Zippo that had somehow made it into his pocket from set. He flicked it with his thumb and held it up, the man leaned slightly and kept his eyes locked with Jared's as he lit his cigarette.

 

"Thanks, mate." Jared could help but cock his head to the side, "No problem."

 

The man nodded thoughtfully, and the smiled, holding his left hand out, "I'm Derrick."

 

"Jared," he replied, shaking the proffered hand. "Nice to meet you."

 

"And you." He took a drag. "So is it jus' me, or did I catch you wa'ching me across the bar?"

 

Jared flushed but didn't answer. The man- Derrick, laughed, "S'ok you know, I don' min'."

 

Jared flushed deeper and bowed his head for a moment before looking back up and getting caught in the man's dazzling smile. "So, what's his name?" he asked quietly.

 

For a moment, Jared was confused, "Whose name?"

 

"The man that stupidly lef' you alone on a Friday night."

 

Jared flushed, "Ah... Him, well..."

 

Derrick took another drag and nodded knowingly, "Doe'n' know how you feel, does he?"

 

Jared shrugged and then shook his head, "No, not so much."

 

He nodded again, "Why don' you tell him then, can't imagine someone turning a man as beau'iful as you down."

 

Jared scoffed, trying to ignore the flush he felt creeping up his flesh once more, "He, ah, well, he just started dating someone."

 

"Oh... I'm... Well, I'm a bit sorry to hear tha'."

 

Jared smirked, "A bit?"

 

"Well," Derrick leaned close, reaching across him to stub out his cigarette. "Means I have a chance, now doe'n't it?"

 

Jared flushed again, and Derrick winked before walking away.

 

He motioned for another beer. There was something about Derrick... And Jared couldn't seem to take his eyes off him. But only until he figured it out, of course.

 

Derrick seemed to sense Jared's eyes on him and turned to give him a wink before walking up to the DJ that was setting up, the DJ nodded and then turned on the stereo.

 

A guitar strain started to play, and a soulful voice 'hmm'-ed along before a heavy beat started pumping and a smooth rap started. He nodded along to the beat, to enthralled with the slow way Derrick started dancing.

 

He heard the chorus start, and a smile smile tugged at his cheeks as Derrick looked back at him. 

 

" _Some day you will be mine, Hope I'm not out of line, I want you to be mine, No one can love you better. And when it's you and me, Oh baby wait and see, I'll give you everything, Oh I can love you better._ " Jared flushed deeper. He wasn't used to being the one that got hit on. He was the one that did the flirting mostly.

 

This was new.

 

He watched as the floor started to fill with dancing couples and groups, and stood up, not wanting to lose sight of Derrick. Not that Derrick would have allowed it, he realized, as the man slipped to the edge of the floor closet to Jared.

 

Jared leaned back against the bar and watched him dance. 

 

He was enthralled with the smooth movements, the way he undulated his hips... Jared swallowed thickly and watched a bead of sweat run down Derrick's neck to the clean whit t-shirt that stretched nicely against well-formed muscle. Jared licked his lips and watched the muscles in Derrick's thighs flex as he stepped from one foot to the other in time to the beat.

 

Much to soon the song was over, and Derrick smiled at Jared before he clapped and started to dance to the new song. Jared smirked in recognition, it was some random song that they'd blared in the make-up trailer more than once.

 

Derrick started to walk over, mouthing the words at Jared, " _Well I'm not paralyzed, but I seem to be struck by you. I wanna make you move, b'cause you're standing still. If your body matches what your eyes can do, You'll probably move right through, me on my way to you._ "

 

"Dance with me," Derrick murmured, rocking his hips to the beat.

 

"I... I don't dance," Jared whispered back, feeling 427 degrees hotter than he normally did as Derrick wrapped his hand around his wrist.

 

"You do now." Derrick gave a sharp tug and pulled Jared out to the floor.

 

Jared stood there for a moment, and then Derrick tugged his hips, pressing them together; forcing his to move. The next thing Jared knew, he was closing his eyes and letting Derrick guide him to the music...

 

Song after song, the beat coursed through him like a new pulse and he opened his eyes to see Derrick watching him from behind half-lidded eyes. Jared licked his lips, and Derrick's eyes snapped to them. Jared grinned and pulled the man to him, blaming the booze and the music and everything else as he pressed their lips together.

 

Derrick's hands gripped the back of his head as his kissed him back.

 

They froze when the kiss broke, standing there; Jared with his hands gripping Derrick's hips and Derrick with his hands in Jared's hair, both breathing hard. Then Derrick winked and started dancing again, Jared smiled and pulled them together as they danced.

 

After a while, anywhere between fifteen minutes and four hours, Jared and Derrick left. 

 

Jared leaned against the building, a beat was pulsing through it from the loud music still playing behind them. He toyed with the keys, and asked a question that he fully blamed on the adrenaline pumping through him. "So... You want to go back to my place for a drink?"

 

Derrick smiled, "I don' drink, but I wouldn't mind going back for a smoke."

 

"I don't smoke." Jared replied, twisting the key chain around his finger. 

 

"So, it's a plan then?" Jared smirked at Derrick's words, and nodded, leading them back to his truck.

 

\-----

 

They were siting on Jared's couch, and Derrick looked surprisingly at ease as he pulled a drag. Jared studied him.

 

Derick was pretty tall, at least six two, and built as well. Jared knew that from the way his muscles had ripped under his clothes as they'd danced. His dark skin was darker than milk chocolate, but just as smooth looking... Jared flushed as Derrick turned and caught him staring. He smiled and dropped his cigarette in Jared's barely touched beer. As he leaned forward to kiss him Jared stilled.

 

It was different now. He couldn't blame the booze -he'd sweat that out long ago- he couldn't blame the music -there was none... Now it was just him and Derrick in his living room.

 

Derrick pulled back, "You know, I'm not expecting anything, Jared... I'm fine jus being a substitute."

 

Jared nodded, but didn't make a move to kiss him. 

 

"I can go...?"

 

"No!" Jared said sharply, and blushed again. 

 

Derrick smirked, "I 'ad hoped not... And Jared," he murmured, running his hand back around Jared's neck possessively, "You change your mind... All you have to do is say no, and this all stops..."

 

Jared shivered at the combination of Derrick's hand caressing him and the accent that poured thickly from him. 

 

And then their lips were pressed together again... And like an electric shot, all the blood pooled low in his abdomen, and he could feel his cock swell as Derrick's hands skated over his chest. 

 

"Wait... Derrick, wait," he breathed pulling back. "I've never... That is to say this is the first time..."

 

Derrick's eyes narrowed, "Is this the first time tha' you've been with a man?" Jared bit his lip and nodded. "Christ, Jared... Do you know 'ow hot that is?" Jared flushed and pulled Derrick back against him...

 

\-----

 

The next morning, when Jared woke up... He blushed. He could still smell the other man on his sheets, on his body, in the air. Could still remember the way Derrick's muscles had umped and twitched under his hands, the way his mouth had wrapped around his cock, the way the man had whimpered and moaned as Jared fucked him, the way he himself had groaned and sworn as Derrick's legs wrapped around his hips...

 

And afterwards, as they had lain together, sharing a cigarette, he remembered how Derrick had propped himself up on his elbow and studied him, "You know... He's righ' lucky bastard."

 

"Who is?"

 

"Who ever it is that's got your heart." Jared had bit his lip then, feeling dirty, feeling like he'd used the gorgeous man next to him. That's when Derrick had sighed, "I didn't do anything I didn't want to, Jared... And if you ever need to again, I can't say tha' I'd argue."

 

Jared blushed like he did in the memory.

 

After that, they'd gotten up and dressed and he took Derrick to his hotel. "How long are you in town for?"

 

" 'M not sure... A week at least, probably two," he'd answered, penning his number on a matchbook and handing it to Jared. "Don' hesitate to call me," he said, and left one last, lingering kiss on his lips before he'd gotten out and walked inside.

 

Jared shook his head and slipped out of bed for a shower, he didn't have anymore time to reflect on his actions, he had to go to work...

 

And Jensen.

 

_Fuck._

 

\-----

 

Jared had just finished in make-up when Eric came up to introduce the new guy.

 

"Okay, so you guys know the script, know the plot, right? We've been getting some flack from the network, they claim that we had hidden racism in the show, say that there has never been a good black man on the show. He is either evil or ends up dead, so we came up with this. Missouri's nephew. Aaron is going to be played by-"

 

"Derrick!" Jared gasped as the man came into view from around the corner.

 

"Jared, whoa... You work here?" Derrick's accent was more pronounced now, as was Jared's. They were both tired.

 

"Um, yeah... I play-"

 

"Sam, righ'... Knew you look'd familiar."

 

"You two know each other?" Jensen asked, looking between them.

 

"Yeah, we, uh..." Jared shifted, unsure on how to elaborate. 

 

"We met at a club las' night," Derrick said, saving him, "Boy, can 'e dance."

 

Jared flushed. "Jay, dance?" Jensen laughed, "Jay never dances."

 

Derrick shrugged, " 'E did las' night."

 

Jensen looked at him with a quirked brow. Jared blushed and turned back to Eric. "Well, that's good," Eric breathed. "Okay, he's done with make-up and wardrobe, we need the three of you on set in thirty minutes. Don't be late Jensen."

 

Jensen sighed and turned towards the trailer door, "You comin', Jay?"

 

"Nah, I'm done with that."

 

"Wan' to show me aroun' then?" Derrick asked, smiling at Jared, ignoring Jensen.

 

"Sure, that'd be great." Jared said, "I'll see you on set, 'kay?"

 

"Yeah... Sure..." Jensen muttered as Jared walked away.

 

As soon as they turned the corner, Derrick looked around subtly and then pushed Jared against the back of the trailer. And Jared didn't fight back, in fact, he did the opposite; he gripped Derrick's hips and pulled him back against him.

 

"Tha's him, innit?" Derrick asked, his lips almost brushing against Jared's.

 

"Whose him?" Jared asked stupidly, waiting for the kiss he was sure was coming.

 

"Wha's 'is name, Jensen. Tha's the guy that you're in love with, that's 'im innit?"

 

"Yeah... That's him." Jared breathed and then Derrick's lips were pressed harshly against his, ravishing him.

 

"Dammit, Jared..." Derrick swore, pressing their forehead's together.

 

Jared breathed heavily. He didn't know what Derrick was talking about, but he knew why it echoed his own thoughts. 

 

Everyone tells you that you love the first person you have sex with, but no one warns you that if you live a straight life and then have sex with someone of the same sex that you get feelings for them as well.

 

Because Jared did. He wasn't sure when it had happened, and maybe he should have seen it coming the moment Derrick caught his eye... But he hadn't, he hadn't known at all. And now all he wanted to do was take Derrick into his trailer and sit with him, exchanging kisses and talking about anything under the sun.

 

Of course, he could say almost the same for Jensen. He knew almost everything about Jen, but that didn't mean he didn't want to make love to him and then lay there for hours and just talk or not talk, but just be together...

 

Now he had feelings for two men, one which only wanted him because they fucked (and apparently Jared wasn't too bad at it) and the other of which would never see him a more than a friend. Jared sighed and then Derrick's lips were pressed back against his.

 

He heard a gasp and pulled back at the same time Derrick did, and in unison they looked towards the noise. Jensen stood just a few feet from them, his jaw on the ground.

 

Jared made like he was going to push Derrick off of him, but then Derrick twisted his head to face him and they were kissing again, and Jared was lost in the sensation and the feelings that were tearing him apart.

 

\-----

 

It was the longest damn day of filming ever. Derrick was a peach to work with, his accent melting away to nothing the moment the word "Action!" rang out on set. It almost amused Jared. Jensen was acting odd, too. Distant, almost.

 

"Jensen..." Jared asked, seeing his co-star quickly leaving set. "Wait up a sec, will ya?"

 

Derrick grabbed Jared's arm, "Wan' me to wait for you?"

 

Jared looked at him, the glimmer of hope in his eye. Jared nodded, "Yeah... I'd like that."

 

"Okay," Derrick murmured, and Jared sprinted over to Jensen.

 

"Hey..." he said quietly.

 

"What's up, Jared? I have a date, and I'd kinda like to get to that."

 

"Can we talk?" Jared felt awkward, like he didn't know where to put himself. 

 

Jensen ran a hand through his hair, "Yeah, sure. I'm guessing you want to go somewhere private?"

 

"If you don't mind."

 

Jensen nodded, "Come on, we'll go to my trailer."

 

They walked in silence to it. "Okay, what's up?" Jensen asked, half sitting half leaning on the small table there.

 

"You've been acting weird all day, how about you tell me?"

 

Jensen looked up at Jared's angry tone. "I just... i had no idea that you swung both ways, Jared... Takes some processing."

 

"You didn't know? What a load of bull shit!"

 

Jensen flinched, "What the hell are you talking about?"

 

"Are you honestly telling me that you have no idea how I feel- How I've felt about you for months? A year? Because if you are, you're the only one."

 

"Wh- What?"

 

"Oh, my God... You're seriously going to try and play that? Everyone know, Jen, _everyone_. Sandy was relieved when I broke up with her, happy that I wasn't going to live a lie anymore. Tom and Mike have both mocked me for ages about being such a girl when it came to you... Everyone knows that I love you, and I can't do it anymore! I can't, Jen... It hurts... too much. I finally work up the nerve to break up with Sandy, tell you how I feel and you start dating that playmate again... So I go out, and meet this guy... 

 

"A guy who likes me, right off the bat, and the only thing I can think of, is you... Dammit, Jen... Let me go! I'm begging you... Let me stop loving you, I can't do it anymore. If you care about me, you'll let me stop loving you; you'll me go."

 

Jared swiped at the angry tears that had escaped him, and left.

 

Derrick was leaning against Jensen's trailer. "Are you alrigh'?" 

 

Jared laughed, "Good question."

 

\-----

 

Jared leaned against the door frame of his bed room and blew out a ring of smoke. Shit was addictive, he thought to himself and looked at his bed. Derrick was there, the tangled sheet wrapped around his naked hips as he slept.

 

He took another drag. There was something about this man. Something more than a beautiful body, and a classic accent. There was something about him that had shine, something that grabbed Jared's attention and held it for more than five minutes. 

 

Only other person he could honestly say that about was Jensen.

 

Jensen... _Fuck._

 

Jared pulled in a long drag and held it until he thought his lungs would burn. This was just not even fair.

 

He'd never understood why people cheated, and he could still say he never would. If he'd still been with Sandy and he'd met Derrick... Nothing would have happened between them. Not until he'd broken up with Sandy. And if he had feelings for both Derrick and Sandy, he would have broken up with Sandy and not done a thing with Derrick until he knew with every fiber of his being just who he wanted with each and every part of him.

 

But this... This wasn't fair. He wasn't cheating on Derrick; Hell, he wasn't even sure what he and Derrick were... But he kept thinking back to Jensen... And that's just not right.

 

He didn't know what to do, he knew he was completely in love with Jensen. Jensen was his first real love after all... But then there was Derrick, and Jared knew he was starting to feel something for that man as well.

 

But... What did it mean?

 

Did it mean that what he was starting to feel for Derrick didn't mean anything because of how he felt for Jensen? That it wasn't as real? It felt real. He looked at Derrick and his heart raced. It felt very real. But at the same time, he knew that what he felt for Derrick wasn't anywhere near what he felt for Jensen... But whose to say that it wouldn't one day? He sighed and walked down the hall to the bathroom and dropped the cigarette butt into the toilet. He started back to the bed room, but stopped just out side the door when he heard a knock. 

 

Jared looked at the clock, Who the fuck...?

 

He pulled a pair of gym shorts up to his naked hips where they slung just below his hip bones. He walked to the door and opened it.

 

"Jen?" he hissed in surprise, "What the hell are you doing here?"

 

"I can't."

 

"What?"

 

"I can't let you go."

 

"Yes, you can."

 

"Yeah, well... I don't want to." Jared pulled in a shaky breath and clenched his jaw. "Jay... Can I just come in?"

 

Jared blocked the door. "No."

 

Jensen looked at him in surprise. "What?"

 

"No, I'm about to go to bed. Whatever you have to say, please say it fast and then go."

 

"Jay, I-"

 

"Jared, is ev'rything okay?" Jared and Jensen looked down the hall at the same moment. Derrick was there, the sheet wrapped around his other-wise naked body.

 

"Yeah, it's fine."

 

"You comin' back to bed?"

 

"I'll be there in a second." Derrick nodded and padded back down the hall with out another word.

 

"You're sleeping with him, Jay? Lying to him? What the hell are you thinking?"

 

"Oh, shut up. What does it even matter? He knows how I feel about you, anyways."

 

"What?"

 

"The first thing we talked about was the way I felt about you, Jen... He told he didn't mind being a substitute... And the more time I spend with him, the more I want to feel for him what I've felt for you for so long. I want to stop loving you."

 

"I don't want you too, Jared; I want-"

 

"I don't care! You had your chance, don't you get that? You had me and you lost me because your head was so far up your ass that you never even noticed. I'm tired Jen... I'm tired of always being there for you and you never even noticing... You've broken my heart so many times... And I can't do it anymore. I'm... Goodbye, Jen." Jared said and closed the door. He leaned against it for a long moment and then walked down the hall to his room.

 

Derrick was smoking a cigarette and sitting on the edge of the bed. He was fully clothed. "You wan' me t' go then?" he asked.

 

"What?"

 

"Well, Jensen came for you, di'n't 'e?"

 

"Well, yeah-"

 

"Then I repea'... Do you wan' me go then?"

 

Jared looked at him, and licked his lips. "No."

 

Derrick stood up and then froze, "Alrigh' I'll see you- Wai' wha'?"

 

"I told him to go," Jared said quietly.

 

"You tol' _'im_ to go?" Derrick asked, confused.

 

"Yeah... I told him to go."

 

Derrick took three steps and then kissed him, "You know I'm leavin' af'er this... I'm no' goin' to be aroun' forever..."

 

Jared pressed their foreheads together, "I know... But I can't keep waiting for him... And I..." he trailed off.

 

"You wha'?" Derrick asked quietly.

 

"I'm starting to feel something for you."

 

Derrick kissed him again, "Well, alrigh' then."

 

\-----

 

The last day of filming with Derrick was a quiet affair. Jensen had been withdrawn the entire fort-night, but that last day was hard on Derrick and Jared as well.

 

Afterwards, they sat in Jared's trailer curled around each other. Derrick's flight was less than two hours after wrap, which meant he could only stay for about a half an hour before getting a ride to the air port.

 

"I'm gonna miss you, you know," Jared murmured quietly. 

 

"Miss you, too, babe..." Derrick whispered back, punctuating his statement with a kiss.

 

Their half hour was up much too quickly. They said good bye in his trailer and Jared watched him leave.

 

He chewed the inside of his cheek and then sprinted out of his trailer. Derrick was half way across the lot when Jared caught him, grabbed his arm and turned him around.

 

Derrick's mouth formed an "O" of surprise, and Jared took that to his advantage grabbing his head in his hands, plundering his mouth with his tongue. Derrick was frozen for a moment, and then his hands found their way to Jared's back, pulling them together impossibly close.

 

They finally pulled apart to breathe to a hail of hoots and cat calls. Jared laughed and then kissed Derrick again, lightly this time. "You call me, ya hear?"

 

Derrick nodded, and smiled sadly.

 

Eric cleared his throat with a quirked brow, "I guess this means Aaron's going to be making a few more appearances then."

 

Jared laughed and waved as Derrick left.

 

\------

 

Jared sighed and set his glass down. This was a disturbingly familiar feeling. He hooked his right foot on to the lowest rung of the stool he was sitting on. 

 

"Hey..." Jared froze, the accent pouring over him like molasses. 

 

It wasn't British this time... It was Texan through and through. 

 

He looked up at Jensen. "What're you doing here?"

 

Jensen licked his lips and snagged Jared's beer. "Derrick told you'd probably be here."

 

"What?"

 

"He knows... That you aren't over me."

 

Jared clenched his jaw, "He doesn't know anything." Like anyone believed that lie.

 

"Why can't you admit it?" Jensen asked, leaning close, "Why can't you just admit that you still love me?"

 

"Because..."

 

"Because you're afraid I'll say it back?"

 

"What?"

 

"Because I do, you know. Love you? Have for ages, but then there was Sandy... And then Derrick... And I tried to tell you, but you wouldn't listen."

 

"What? When?"

 

"When I came to your house? The second day after filming with him."

 

Jared bit his lower lip, feeling like an idiot... He'd just thought that Jensen didn't want him with another man after only knowing him for such a little time. "But I... You... What?"

 

"I love you. I'm not over you, I've never been over you. I've never even tried."

 

"I..."

 

"Look, Jay... If we're meant to be together, then we'll be together. If not today then someday. I'm not saying this because I'm jealous or I want to ruin whatever it is that you and Derrick have... I'm saying this because I only think it's only fair that you know how I'm feeling... Because I know how you're feeling."

 

Jared watched him leave, and then pulled out his phone, punching the speed dial. " _'Ello?_ "

 

"Hey," he murmured quietly, not sure where he was going to go from there.

 

" _I know, love... An' it's okay. I knew when I star'ed with you tha' you loved 'im... So I can' really blame you, can I?_ "

 

"I'm sorry..."

 

" _Don' be... You never lied to me... I always knew, I jus' though' that it migh' change... An' it di'n't..._ " Jared bowed his head, he felt like scum. " _Stop bea'in' yourself up, you di'n't do anythin' wrong. I don' regre' anythin'... And I can only hope it's the same for you._ "

 

Jared slipped the phone back in his pocket as he heard the beep telling him that the call was over.

 

He stood up and walked out, Jensen was standing at his car staring at his keys.

 

"Forget which one you need?" Jensen started and looked at him, "Hey..."

 

"Hey."

 

"So... I'm guessing you called Derrick?" Jared flushed. "What did he have to say?"

 

"He told me that I shouldn't feel bad for loving you, that I never lied to him and that he didn't regret it."

 

"Oh... Well..."

 

Jared flushed and then stepped foreword, "If it's meant to be..."

 

Jensen linked their fingers, "It's meant to be."

 

They kissed, and everything in the world aligned. 

 

Whatever Jared had felt for Jensen before... It wasn't love. This... This feeling _now_ , this was love. He felt like he was glowing, like he'd swallowed a 1,000,000,000 watt light bulb and was glowing like the prince at the end of the 'The Beauty and The Beast'.

 

This was what destiny felt like.


End file.
